Do no harm, but take no shit

It's quite easy to be deceived by the idea that "nice" people will happily take your shit and not fight back to keep the peace. And in a lot of cases, this is correct.

Because, as I have explained so many m a n y times, there is a difference between nice and kind.

Nice is a mask. Nice is wrapped up in social expectations and ego...while kind don't play like that.

Nice is bullshit. Kind is real.
Nice isn't always kind. Kind isn't always nice.

Nice respects mores and norms, but not boundaries.

Kindness respects boundaries, including your own.
This is why it's acceptable to do no harm but take no shit; it's practically the Kindness Bible!

When dealing with many philosophical ideas about how we treat other creatures, we neglect to turn those teachings back on ourselves and see how it feels. That is a practice we should ALL get more comfortable with and kindness is no exception.

Showing yourself kindness means enforcing the boundaries you have set for yourself. Setting those boundaries is only half the battle...enforcing them is often the harder part.

Ask yourself, why should someone else's feelings be more important than mine?
Why should I be "nice" to them if they cannot even be "kind" to me?
If I'm not disrespecting anyone with my boundaries, why should I allow anyone to disrespect me with their lack of boundaries?

And once you view it like that, nice doesn't seem like the better option...does it?

Read the original sentiment again:
Do no harm, but take no shit.

The answer is right there.
Is the person disrespecting you holding up their end of the bargain?
No.

So, drop that mask of NICE but never let go of your identity as KIND.

Remember, the only people who will dislike you for enforcing your own boundaries and advocating for yourself never respected you or those boundaries. Think of them as life's lessons, and they're quite safe to leave behind after the lesson has been learned.

The people who appreciate your boundaries, the people who cheer you on for advocating for yourself...these are your people. Hold them close, but take no shit.